There is a very common misconception among people that the massage therapist always knows how deep to massage and what is best. Nothing could be further from the truth. Only the client can fully know if a massage is too painful, a stone too hot or a stretch too intense.
This is why it is very important that you as a client speak up. You have a responsibility to inform your therapist of anything which bothers you. If you feel a massage goes too deep and the pain becomes too much, inform the therapist and ask her to ease off. If during a stone massage a stone burns you or feels too hot, inform the therapist immediately so they can adjust the temperature and avoid burning you. If the work is too superficial and not deep enough, do tell.
There have unfortunately been incidents where poorly educated or inattentive stone therapists have burnt their clients. Laying them on too hot stones without any protective layer in between, massaging with stones which burn, or using stones chilled in the deep freezer.
It is my responsibility as a therapist to remind you about your control over the session. Before the massage begins, it is my duty to discover what type of massage you want. While you fill the intake form, we discuss the session ahead and what your intention with the massage is. If you enjoy deep work or would rather have a gentle massage and if we should focus on the physical or energetic work, or a combination thereof.
During the massage I ask you if the temperature of the stones is all right, how you liked the cold stone, and how specific techniques feel for you. This is in particular important during your first massage where I do not yet know you. As I get to know you better, I also know your responses and how you like your massages.
I can read a lot from how your body reacts to various techniques. Generally if I go too deep some muscles will tighten, either where I’m working or elsewhere. If a stone is too hot, you might shift or react. If a stone isn’t cold enough, you very likely will show discomfort.
But I am not in your skin. I can only estimate how a given technique or temperature affects you, and that is why it is very important that you speak up the moment something doesn’t feel good.
You are in charge of the session. You decide if something is too much or too little. The therapist might explain why a technique is done in that way, and you can then evaluate if that is acceptable. But in the end, you decide. You are in power.
So please speak up, you are empowered.